Fault line

I was raised on the whole 'If you got nothing nice to say, then better say nothing at all' concept, and I am grateful for that. But as much as I try to live by it on a daily basis, sometimes there's simply too much annoyance going on to actually stick to it.

My fault, I know.

And what really works me up are dumb people. Dumb as in acting ignorant, insensitive, rude.

See, my mom has Parkinsons disease. She's been sick for more than 10 years, so this is not new to me, but as it is a progressive disease things naturally don't get better, but only worse.

So yeah, big news, Parkinsons may not be deadly but it's not a walk in the park either. For none of us. She's slow and fragile, has developed a hunch and her sense of balance is majorly screwed up once the meds are wearing off before the next dose is due. Logically, her self-confidence is not the best.

It therefore hurts twice as much if people keep staring at her like she's some kind of freak.

If they keep pushing her away when she can't get out of their way fast enough. Because apparently it doesn't matter if you bump into an old lady who's simply happy to be exceptionally feeling well enough to enjoy a rare trip downtown with her only daughter.

If they make dumb comments once she loses balance again and nearly trips in the middle of a packed department store. No, she's also not drunk or in withdrawal, thanks for considering that. And yes, poor me is her daughter who actually cares and gives a damn whether you treat her nicely or not. Too many don't.

I keep telling her to directly ask people on the bus to offer her a seat, as most simply don't. And I'm not talking about young folks exclusively, but about grown men, suit and tie, too, who should know better. 

Didn't their parents teach them manners? 

Were they raised by a pack of wolves? 

When did being polite became so out of fashion? 

Being ignorant the new mantra to aim for?

Another example?

One of my best friends is diabetic. Type I. Got it when he was 12. Probably genetically inherited, it runs in the family. Which means that all the insulin producing beta cells in his pancreas are literally dead. Not producing any insulin at all. It's different from Type II diabetes and there's no way you can compensate your carbohydrate exchange (or bread units, or sugar input, whatever you prefer) without insulin injections at all.

In case you didn't know.

Which literally boils down to the fact that he has to get his injections a couple of times a day. No matter where we are. One afternoon we were standing right in front of a clothing store downtown when my friend realized his blood sugar was way too high to not do something about it. So he got out a syringe, drew up the insulin and started injecting himself. No biggie. Until the security guy in front of the store suddenly started shouting at us. I won't go into detail but his tirade contained a lot of beep-worthy words as well as fragments like 'junkie', 'police' and 'restraining order'. My friend calmly finished his shot, put away the syringe and all he said was 'Well, I'm diabetic, would you mind giving your general manager a call? I'd like to have a word with him.' Silence. …. Apologies.

Didn't we all watch Trainspotting at some point in our lives? Or any other movie that explicitly depicted someone shooting up heroin? Drugs are injected into veins, insulin is injected into intramuscular fat aka the belly and likewise.

It's not exactly rocket science.

I don't blame those who don't know. I didn't wish to become an expert on Parkinsons or diabetes in the first place. But instead of simply staring or making stupid comments or being rude with no obvious reason while assuming things one shouldn't, people could simply talk to those affected and ask what's going on. Doesn't hurt.

Thing is, they don't. Nobody ever does.

And while biting my tongue nine out of ten times to swallow down that snarky comment, I can't hold it back all the time and in the end it's me who feels bad for saying things to others I probably shouldn't. Even if I got every right to do so. Cause that's the way I was raised and taught to treat others. With respect

I wish there would be some kind of moral lesson to this, but to be honest, I fear there isn't. It's just me getting it all off my chest. Good days, bad days. And a good rant is just what I needed.